A Welcome Home Reception

We would like to acknowledge that the absence of our collective presence in your lives was surely unbearable. In order to ease your pain, you are cordially invited to a Welcome Home Reception to celebrate the return of meaning into your lives, our fabulous tans, couture and South Beach chic. The evening shall begin with cocktails and appetizers (BYOB and BYOA) at the exclusive venue at 529 Yonge Street. Later your gifts for the four returning Divas of Honour shall be opened in an elaborate ceremony (BYOEC). Because we care deeply about you, we included a convenient gift registry below. Finally, salsa dancing shall close the evening at Grande Primpin' at Wrong Bar. We trust you will drape yourselves in your finest (slutty) South Beach chic attire. Please RSVP at our earliest convenience (aka NOW).

Eternal love and kisses,

Jasun, Derek, Fabio and Doug




The gift registry is as follows:

-Post-South Beach, Distress and Suicide Prevention Hotline
-Tom Ford Sunglasses (Jasun)
-Mat black Prada aviators (Doug)
-Advanced lap dance lesssons (Fabio)
-Everything by All Saints (Derek)
-Da pom pom juice (for all)
-All the vegetables in Burma
-Wifi / Internet connections
-Tanning salon gift cards
-Gourmet Mexican food
-Aloe vera lotion x8
-A 26er of flavoured vodka that costs MORE than $9
-Tank tops from Barney's South Beach
-Extra short, short shorts
-Lacoste beach towels
-Italian to English dictionary (Fabio)
-Spanish to English dictionary (Doug)
-Clean stemware
-Personal trainers
-Homeless drag queen
-Teeth whitening
-Waxing appointments
-Haagen Dazs
-Independent lattes
-Hamburger meat
-Grill Fish